Merry Christmas...

Merry Christmas <3

Running on E: Mentally, Physically, and Spiritually exhausted.

I'm tired.

I think my last post was about happiness, and within the past few months, that concept has somehow eluded me.

I've been meaning to blog for a really long time because for whatever reason that always helps me when I'm down in the dumps, and I have been down there lately, just at an all time low. There are a lot of factors that play into this: I started working a 2/3 split of 12 hr nights last April, when I have time off I don't get to do much but catch up on sleep (which doesn't leave much room for socialization), when I am socializing I'm a shell of a person because I am usually forcing myself to stay awake, I'm not very pleasant to be around, so I've formed a lot of resentments towards people and I'm sure a lot of people aren't too fond of me. This job has literally transformed me into my very worst self, and I'm not even drinking, oh and not to mention I don't go to church, work out, or go to AA meetings regularly.

I'm not okay.  I don't want your advice. I'm just here to type. I don't want you to fix me, I just want you to listen to my problems. I don't think anti depressants will work this one out.

I haven't been working out and my hormones are all out of wack, this has caused me to gain weight, and the weight gain is hard to shake because I know the best solution to this problem is to make healthier choices, but when you work night shift--- it puts so much stress on your body, and when you're stressed you want to eat more, do less-- EVEN IF YOU KNOW YOU SHOULD BE DOING THE OPPOSITE. I really do think I'm in some sort of weird state of acknowledged depression, but even though I am AWARE, it's still hard to break the continuous cycle.

So yes, I've been meaning to write, but there's nothing really to say except for that I don't particularly like myself very much, and probably don't particularly like you either, but I wouldn't tell you that to your face, and don't ask me how I am when you see me in public.  You could either get one of two respsonses: "I'm doing really well" in that super fake tone OR "I'm not doing so good.. blah blah blah... wah wah wah..."

I'm applying to Occupational Therapy school. Sometimes our dreams change, I have had many people question whether or not I'm making the right choice, and I just want to smack people.....Is this your life????? I didn't think so...Thank you for your concern, now good bye.

I'm so tired of the outside world and all of its influences in my life.  I just want to have my own voice and I can't remember what that sounds like anymore...I've been allowing people's opinions persuade me for way too long----and social media only contributes more to that madness... which is why I've deleted my FB and deactivated my IG.

I'm going to recreate myself, again, be reborn out of the ashes, like a phoenix.

If I've been ugly to you in the past 5-6 months. I really am sorry. It's nothing personal, I'm just really not doing so well spiritually, which causes me to lash out at people who get in my way.  Most of the time it's not you, it's me.

I can't remember why I started writing this, but I feel a lot better now.

Happiness

I've been thinking a lot lately. I think that thinking too much, for me at least, is very dangerous territory.

However, this time, I've been thinkng a lot about happiness and what do I need to acquire in order to remain (relatively) happy? 

I think my fondest memories, ones that I seek to relive, are found in my childhood. There's a special friend in meetings that always says refinding his childlike nature is a by product of working the steps. 

I agree with this because 9 times out of 10 my worries and problems are of my own making. When I was 5 (besides sadness) I didn't really have any problems. No worries. Happiness was effortless and today it can be the same. 

I know how to find happiness within myself today. So when people think they are important enough to fulfill my happiness it makes me laugh, or when j make the mistake of thinkng one person can make me feel validated, happy, sane... I'm making a mistake. 

I'm tired of searching for someone that I fear doesn't exist. The guy of my dreams isn't going to be found on some dating website... He's not going to be found in a bar and honestly he's not so much going to be found anywhere but behind me or I infront of me waiting for our paths to cross, but not really searching for the intersection. 

I am done. You can have it. Here it is. I am letting you have this. I have proven to myself time and time again that I am not good. My picker is broken, and the decisions I make for myself are always bad. You can have it now. 

Misha 

ROME....if you WANT to.

Hello Everyone,

I'm writing to you from Florence. I should be in Madrid, but here I am in Italy for another day.  Why you ask?  I'll get to that later on in the post....but first...Roma.

Roma, dearest, sweet, LOVELY......or not, Roma. I fell in love with you at first site of the Colosseum, but then after that...you really didn't have much for me. My friend (Catalina) and I arrived in Rome on Saturday evening. We checked into our hostel and decided to get a shower and get ready to go find a place to eat. First experience with public transport in Italy...I lost 10 euros. I was trying to buy a pass for the next 48 hours, and the machine took my money. Anyways, I tried not to let that get to me, and my friend and I decided to take taxis for the duration of the trip (which I sincerely regret now because I could honestly use that money)--

The first night we ended up at the cutest little restaurant near Piazza Navona. We sat down and ordered and two guys ended up sitting at the table next to us. We started to chat it up with them by the end of our meal. Come to find out--one of them was the owner. He actually owned two restaurants. The one in which we were dining and another on the other side of the Piazza. We sat and chatted with them until we got sleepy, and then headed back to the hostel to get some shut eye, because we needed rest for our long day of sight seeing in the morning.

The next morning we woke up and planned out a visit to the Colosseum, The Trevi, and The Pantheon.  You know, I can't quite describe in words how impressive the Colosseum is in person. It's MASSIVE.  I mean, you learn that in school, but seeing it, up close....It was mind blowing...and to the think of how it must have been when they actually used it-- astounding. Probably my favorite part of Roma. The pantheon was alright, and the trevi---well that's just depressing. It's under construction for the summer, so literally you cannot see it at all. It was so sad. I took the best possible picture that I could...but you know. whatevs. Im trying to think what else...Oh yea---Catalina got to enjoy a vespa ride of the city that night as well. I was left to hang out with Stefan and Blaron, our restaurant owner friends--which that got awkward because apparently they wanted more than friendship. I mean--none of them made a physical pass at me, but they kept talking about us "liking them" and got mad when we would say Ciao to other guys walking past....So in case you were wondering ladies...Men are the same.EVERYWHERE. It's an international issue. Anyways, night two of Roma ended, and Day three started with the Vatican--which we barely saw. A lot of the sistine chapel was under maintenance as well. Also, making our way to the chapel felt like we were marching to our death. We were literally packed like Sardines shuffling in and out of one room and then another, forever waiting for the impending doom that wait around the corner. The sistene Chapel was cool and all....but Once you've seen one chapel.. you've seen them all.


Rome left a terrible taste in my mouth. I couldn't wait for our journey to continue along to our next destination:  Siena.

Siena was a quaint little city in Tuscany. It's medieval architecture and bizarre layout makes you really feel like you're in a different time. I wish we had longer to explore here, but then again, all you really need is one full day. It was a nice break after having such an exhausting trip in Rome.  We visited the Douma, and just walked around taking pictures. There were many beautiful views. I recommend Siena to future travelers. After spending the night and one day in Siena, we took a train to Florence.

I originally only had one day here, and so to make the most of it Catalina and I decided to rent bikes. It was soooo worth it.  We just rode around all day and enjoyed everything that we could from the outside. We rode our bikes to a spectacular view from Piazza S. Miniato. I took a few pictures but will more than likely just upload them on Facebook. We also rode around the Doumo. We paid to enter, but the lines were still SUPER long, and we only had a few hours until we had to catch our train, so we just decided to ride to the Mercato Centrale and buy souvenirs for friends and family.

Exploring Florence (Firenze) by bike is a great way to see a lot of the city---just in case any of you come to Florence and want some options for getting around.

So here's when things really took a turn for the worst, or the best?  Who's to know?

We took a train to Pisa and made it there to take some pics with the tower. Our pics turned out pretty bad, but at least we can say we've been to Pisa. We stayed in the cutest little hostel, and the lady called a cab for me so I could catch a ride to the airport to get my flight.  My flight was at 645 this morning.  The taxi never showed up.  It was 550 and I was starting to get nervous about missing my flight. So I quickly took my happy little behind to the train station in order to flag down a taxi.  I made it by 610. There were no taxis to be seen. Catalina found the number to the taxis at the airport. I called it and they said they would send me one ASAP.  I decided to go ahead and grab my passport and my ticket so I would have it ready when I got to the airport. *MISTAKE*.  In my haste to get out of the taxi...I somehow unknowingly left my passport sitting in the seat of the taxi...and I didn't realize it until I was through the other side of security. Literally wanted to cry. I was an undocumented citizen for about 30 minutes in Pisa, Italy.  Thank God the airport security were very sweet. They all calmly helped me search. I told them what happened, they told me not to panic, it would be ok.  I could go to Rome and speak with the Consulate.  After searching my bags, APS went to find the Italian Police.  He told me I could try and talk to the taxi drivers and see if any of them found a passport. I told him I would like to do that, but he must have gone to do it himself because he left for a few minutes and when he came back he had a HUGE grin on his face and he was waving my passport in the air !! :D

It's been almost five hours and I'm sitting in Catalina's hostel in Florence waiting to check into mine at 1 pm. I decided to type this because I needed to get it all out. Man, I sure do have some stories to tell my children about.  I swear of all of the things a person can do...losing your passport has to be one of the worst.  I don't know. I must be getting old. I can't believe I did something like that, but then again, that's what happens when you live your life in a hurry. You forget to pay attention to the most important things.


Lots of love,

Misha.

Marco, Marruecos, Morocco

Hello my friends, we meet again! Wow, it's been a crazy couple of weeks. I've been going to classes everyday, and traveling MUCHO on the weekends. Valencia was last weekend. I've already uploaded pictures on Facebook. I don't really have much to say about Valencia because it's just been too long and it's not very fresh on my brain.  It's a shame, too, because it was such a beautiful city. <3 I got a really nice sun burn which has turned into the most beautiful bronzey shade. :) This I am happy about.

Mood:  tired, grateful.

So since I can't remember much of Valencia...I will post a couple of photos here and then I will move onto Morocco--because so far, it's been my favorite, and to be quite fair--- there's not much to say about Morocco besides this: It's beautiful in the photographs, but the pictures don't do the cities we saw any justice. I also wish I had more time, to wander off, to explore, to take more raw pictures of the way these people were living, so that you could see the poverty in this third world country.  That's one thing that I have really seen so much of since I have been here-- real poverty.

Back where I am from I am very sheltered of the reality of going without.  Some of these people here were literally living like they did in the movie Slum Dog Millionaire, but there was so much history in this place, and so much dedication to a religion that I don't really know much about, besides hatred, and fear, but if what I knew were to be true, then I know I wouldn't have been treated so kindly by all of the people I came across (besides the shop keepers who were desperate for your money)---

There was one time on the trip when we literally passed (by bus) an entire mountain side littered with plastic bags.  I thought maybe for decoration because there were SOOO many of them. Thousands, maybe millions scattered about, stuck in the brush---and all you can wonder is--why? The guides didn't have answers and I imagine it's something like---just because.

Our hotel was really nice, pretty much in the middle of nowhere, but the schedule of the tour stayed relatively close to the times we were supposed to be here and there. The tour guides were very sweet and funny. Daniel and Carlos were there names. One of which I thought was guapisimo, but I won't go into detail here ;).   We also had a Moroccan guide, and a guide in the city of Chefchauen. Pictures to drop later. I wasn't impressed with the food, but I'm very hard to please. I think I might be a food snob. Some of the meat tasted off to me, as did a lot of things. I was careful not to drink any of the water.  I tried my best to dress appropriately. I was never shouted at or spit on.  I found it to be quite the contrary, people were all very welcoming and friendly.

Oh and for the record, I SUCK at bartering or whatever that b word is. I am actually really really bad at it. So here's to hoping the man I marry is really good at bargaining in the streets of large cities. Not my forte. The scarf you sea in the photos : 9 euros. Simply because I am an idiot. I was also asked to find a pin for my friend and a tea pot of silver for my professor. I found the teapot, bought it for 26.50 (euro)-- when I could have gotten it for lower (15-20).  Then couldn't find the pin all together. My friends, if you ever want someone to barter for something for you-- I AM NOT YOUR GIRL--- Promise. You will not get a deal. You will not get any of your money back, you will infact probably owe me money in the end.  That is all. :)


We rode camels by the sea, after which our tour guide asked... "Well guys,  did enjoy your ride -- camel?" --- mixing up the words ride and camel. tres cute.

I'm procrastinating on school work because I can't get anything else out. My creative juices in regards to analyzing literature are failing me now.  I am taking a free-writing descanso to break the monotony.

Of course, these photos and these blogs are tangible evidence that I once was here. That this place was my home for a time. That my footsteps have walked in these places and seen these wonders.  I look around me sometimes and I take a deep breath smelling the air and I think to myself, how lucky are you? 26, still in college, and able to be on this magnificent journey.  4 years ago you hated your life, the direction you were headed, and you couldn't stop thinking about all of the terrible things you had done or thought you would do .

Here I am today in Spain, typing this, 4 years sober (on the 10th of July)-- and happy as can be in Europe, able to travel with ease from place to place, gaining new stamps in my passport, making new friends, and creating memories to stow away in the deep dark memory recesses of my mind, so that one day I can encourage my children to go on their own adventures.

Thank you universe, for swallowing me up and spitting me back out, new, fresh, clean.

I am sooooooooo eternally grateful.

xoxo.

M.

The most PRECIOUS picture of us on our way to Morocco. Literally could not get a good photo. hahaha

Headed to the Blue city of Chefchauen

Carlos and Daniel

Allie, our hotel waiters, and myself.

By the sea in Assilah

Allie and Myself with our two Spanish tour guides, our Moroccan tour guide and our bus drivers.

You only camel once.

Camels love forever

so cuttte

May you never miss another belt loop, ever.

and may the next girl that tells you that you did, be me.

amen.

I carry your heart, I carry it in my heart.

Well I'm feeling a little over the weather and also, under it. I got back from England last night at 1130 pm. My flight was a little behind, so I didn't get back to my house in Alcalá until 12 in the morning. I also had to take a taxi, and almost didn't have enough money because for some reason my bank card wouldn't let me take out cash. There happened to be a little blessing in the form of a beautiful, kind hearted spirit from Florida there to save the night, so I ended up with 45 euros extra, which covered the taxi ride and a tip.

SOOOO, yeah, a lot has happened since I've last written. I don't have many photos, honestly not really any that you haven't seen on FB. My phone was stolen during a moment of stupidity in Madrid last week. I was pretty panicky when it first happened because it was taken literally a few hours before my flight to London and I had no other way to communicate with my friend Thaddaeus on meeting time and place in the airport when I landed that evening. My friend Rebeca was with me, and I honestly don't know what I would have done if I had been alone. I say that, and I know that in emergency situations we do what we have to do, but someone was looking out for me when they gave me a friend, because my freak out factor was about a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10.  After I spazzed out for a good 2-3 minutes we decided to go to the US Embassy so I could make phone calls and arrangements with Thad for that evening. 

Man I miss America. I mean it. The embassy sure was good to me. I know that's ultimately what they are there for, but I don't know what I would have done without that little flare of good ole red, white, and blue to calm my spirits. I was able to call my dad, Thad (like 5 times), use the internet to text EVERYONE and their mom on Facebook, and email my professors. I am glad Rebeca and I even thought of the idea to go there because I knew by the time I realized my phone was gone, there was nothing the local authorities could have done to find it anyway. You know what though? the beauty in making mistakes for me is that I definitely won't make THAT one twice... #TRUST.

After I sorted everything out at the embassy, I bought a burn phone. Have you ever done something and realized RIGHT in the moment that you are doing it, you should have done it AGES ago. Yeah, that was me with my burn phone. It has internet access, I can text and call people here for cheap, and I still have my laptop to call my parents... Damn hindsight. Oh well.

So I made my flight to London and finally arrived around 11 ish pm. I made it to Thad's house after going through the million question custom shenanigans in which they ask you all about your personal life, but thank goodness for them. Safety is safety, I suppose. 

Thaddaeus Jackson Browne, I will type his full name, only here because it is pretty intense. You would think the guy was a Lord or something with a name like that.  Any who, I  met him 7 years ago, the last time I made it over the pond, and this was the first time I had seen him since.  He has moved back home and is living in New Cross, London with his parents (Rosalyn and Gilbert), brother (Nathaniel), and good friend Joan. It was a full house, and I loved EVERY minute of it.

His mum was the sweetest, so was his dad. They fed and housed me for three nights. Thad was able to take off two days of work for sightseeing on Wednesday and Friday.  Thursday I was on my own, so Ros helped me map out a sight seeing journey along the River Thames. I was a bit scared at first, but it wasn't hard to get around with London's awesome public transportation system. I kind of like not having to drive anywhere. I also met the sweetest girl from Bulgaria. She was also sightseeing on her own and offered to take some pictures for me, we continued to travel with one another for the remainder of the journey so we could take each others pictures with the important monuments.  I believe she tagged a photo of us on FB, so have a look if you're interested :).

Anyways I saw SOOO many things, and Thaddeaus took tons of pictures, but they are all on his phone and his mom's camera (from the second day). We had dinner every night at the house and I enjoyed the familial sense of love and community. I miss that --being that I am millions of miles away from my own.

On Friday I said goodbye to Thad at King's Cross Station -- we were going to get a picture with platform 9 and 3/4 but I couldn't stand to wait in the long ass line. I love Harry Potter, but honestly my train was about to arrive and they WILL leave you.

I took the train at 530 up North to Newcastle to see my bestie overseas : Hayley Irving. I haven't seen her in 7 years, and she and I grew pretty close in the summer that I was there before.  She met me at the train station after my 3 hour non stop scenic route, and we hugged--- nearly squeezing the breathe out of each other. I can't tell you how awesome it was to be with her again. We drank tea pretty much the entire time, and when we weren't drinking tea we were being fatties, or shopping. The first night we went to the cinema and saw a scary movie---for old time's sake! We saw insidious 3-- was really good!! :) We stayed up until 3 am chatting, woke up at 10 the next day -- had sushi for lunch at a place called NUDO-- SOOOOO GOOD. I hadn't had sushi since leaving the states, so it really fulfilled the craving. 

Hayley and I are both ditzy--so I enjoyed being around someone who was just as clumsy and silly as me. Also she is one of the sweetest people I have ever known. She is living with her Boyfriend Simon-- and their Cat -- Bijoux.  Both of which I had the pleasure to meet. 

There are some moments in life that you just hold onto forever and wish to play over and over and over again in your mind.  This particular weekend will be one of them.  I cried the entire way back to Madrid on Monday night.  Every time I looked at a photo-- crocodile tears. and I'm not ashamed to admit it. 

I am so grateful to have been able to return. It was all in all a fabulous trip. Getting to see Thaddaeus, meeting his family, and of course getting to see Hayley meeting Simon and Bijoux--oh and LOUISE- I got to see Louise, and her partner Michael and their sweet little baby Ezra. :) 

It was just such a great time, and I know I will cherish it forever.

I got back home at midnight, unpacked my things, went to sleep feeling fine, and woke up this morning with the crud. I think I may have to see the doctor tomorrow because I feel pretty yucky. Aches all over, drainage in the back of my throat, pain from pressure in my head. I hope to get some good sleep tonight and feel rejuvenated tomorrow. I bought some green tea, lemon, orange juice, and some gatorade--and my friend Rebeca gave me some nasal congestion medicine. Let's cross fingers and hope this does the trick.

I had my first day of my new classes today with my professors from back home Brian and Karina. Hispanic Civilization and Literary Analysis.  

I'm really glad I took the classes that I did last semester because I feel like they somewhat prepared me for this material, so even though I slaved away writing papers and getting little sleep to meet their deadlines (because I love to procrastinate...I don't want to hear it)--- none of it was in vain.

Today we started reading some poetry in our literary analysis class and our professor asked us what our favorite poem was-- en todo el mundo-- in the whole world)

Mine is easily : I carry your heart with me -- by E.E. Cummings

"i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)

i am never without it(anywhere i go you go,my dear;

and whatever is done by only me is your doing,my darling) 

 i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)

i want no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true) 

and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant 

and whatever a sun will always sing is you 

here is the deepest secret nobody knows 

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud 

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows 

higher than soul can hope or mind can hide) 

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart 

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)"

I have met so many people in the span of my young life that this applies to, and just because you are not able to be with me physically does not mean I do not carry you with me-- in my thoughts,  in my actions, in my footsteps, in my words, in my laugh, in my smile ---but most important of all--- in my HEART. <3

All of my love,

until next time,

M.

Amante de Barcelona

Well... Ive done it  again people. I've waited nearly an entire week and haven't told you about my last adventure... Though it seems every day is an adventure for me in España! 

This week is our final week of the first month and it's been pretty busy. We've had two presentations, a group project (we had to record a video... I sang a Katy perry song ...in English. My class mate pretended to be Enrique Iglesias...), etc etc ... So needless to say... Busy week. 

But first things first... Barcelona... 

Ohhh Barcelona , dear, sweet, magnificent, wonderful, lovely, Barcelona! Me encanta mucho Barcelona. I know what you're thinking... How could you fall in love with the city that is world renowned for being one of the top 3 cities in the world for pick pocketing?? Well let me tell you, yo tenía mucho miedo over this just like every Typical American tourist would... But I was so overly careful that I never felt unsafe, minus riding on the metro, but even then... If You keep your travel wits about you.. No pasa nada. 

First off Trip started on a Thursday ... So I missed one day of class because we literally had a 7 hour bus ride from 11-morning time. Talk about awful. Riding by bus sucks ... Just FYI. We finally got there and I looked to Allie and said yay.. And she said... You know we can't check in until 12 right ???? And I literally thought I was about To fall over and die, because it was 8 o'clock and we had to find ways to stay occupied until 12. Allie and decided to go ahead and take a taxi to the hostel which ended up being SUPER dope (the generator, one of top 3 out of 50 in Barcelona... Just for future reference)...  Anyways super dope hostel but found out we actually couldn't check in until 2... So we locked our belongings up and did what girls do best ... SHOPPED ... And saw Barcelona too of course. I bought a swim top (pictured) and a couple of other things...

We decided we would hit up the beach later... So we literally did all of this for hours until we decided to have lunch and head back to the hostel for our rooms. 

Once checked in we showered and hit up the beach.... Beach life in Barcelona ... Is where it's at. Now we were also told to come back for the discotecas at night. We met a couple of guys from England (and Wales) pictured, and they invited us to hang out with them later that evening.

I was a tad smitten with the one from Wales ... so we decided we would check it out later. We went back to the hostel, got ready and headed back to the beach.  Allie and I are professionals with the metro system in Barcelona. I'd say we know it like the back of our hand. 

We went to Bestial... Met up with the guys ended up splitting up for the night...because I wanted to spend some time with the guy I was smitten with.. Allie took a taxi home... I ended up getting LITERALLY pushed to the road at 539 in the morning because I *sorry I'm a very blatantly honest person... Continue reading at your disgression*. I'm a make out girl. I don't have sex. I don't do anything sexual--- i will kiss you if we get along and we've just met ... That's as far as it goes , most men think I'm kidding or that I'm some sort of challenge or prize... They like to see how far they can really get... Sometimes its easy for me to scope these guys out... Sometimes I fall for stupid sweet lines and charming looks... Oh and did I say welsh accents ???  So this guy ends up wanting sexual pleasure ... Not my MO... He literally kicked me out at 530 AM in the streets of a city I didn't know. I had 9% battery life  left on my iPhone and had no idea where I was.. It was by the grace of a god higher than me that j made it back to my hostel that morning. I told the taxi driver that took me. "Tu has salvado mi vida". He laughed. I didn't. 

Anyways... So that's not your usual Friday night, but thank God I don't drink or otherwise I would have never made it. 

Allie and I hit up Parc Güell the following afternoon. Talk about struggle bus city. Getting to the top is so steep they installed outdoor escalators. I'm going to have to say this... Not even worth it. I LOVE GAUDIS work... Huge fan, but you know how you go to an overcrowded theme park and wait hours and hours to ride your favorite ride ??? Yeah ... Too many people in a small area trying to take a picture of the same thing. I got my picture with the wall though ... Which apparently, if you don't you weren't ever in Barca?? Did you know ? I didn't. Glad I got a photo. Allie didn't however so I guess that means she wasn't really there! 😂😂😂

Allie and stuck together all day.. We went back to the hotel afterwards had comida, met some really cool guys in the hostel cafe -- they were from North Carolina and backpacking through Europe! Very cool dudes. They invited us to Opium that night -- we told them we would go and meet them there. Boy do I love to dance. 

We got ready headed out for a night on the town. We had so much fun. Allie bumped into a guy from France on the dance floor and he invited us to the VIP section. We could see everything from there. Free red bull-- whatever we liked. That was fun for a while, but we decided to move around a little more and meet some more people . Discoteca dancing is so refreshing... It's nothing like bumping and grinding and dirty dancing. It's a lot of fun.  

We kind of weaved in and out of people all night had a really good time... Went home around 430. Passed out.. 

And never woke up in time on Sunday for Sagrada Familia. 

We have decided we will return.

I fell in ❤️ with Barca because it's so full of life --- I just wanted to stay there and continue exploring all of it.  

Other than that... I've been homesick for a couple of days. We don't realize how much we take for granted, like water for example. You pay for it everywhere around here. Unless in casa, in restaurants... You pay. 

I miss my diet from back home. Mostly I miss leafy greens: spinach, kale. I also miss my berries and Greek yogurt and carrots!!! 

I called my best friend and had a good cry session today. I also went to mcdonalds and had a cheeseburger. I tried not to be to hard on myself about it, but honestly it's the only food here that makes me feel remotely close to being home. 

I love you all.

xoxo

M. 

Allie and I 

Allie, the England guys, me

Cool giraffe statue in the city 

First night out in Barca

Huge plaza ❤️

Güell Parc 

With the wall. I was there. MIRA!!!! Look!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

PS. 

Really funny side note... People think Im from Spain all of the time. I mean.. Natives will ask me sometimes because I'm morena. :) however, this story really takes the cake... Allie and I were riding the metro to the beach one night around 130. There were tons of people from America on the same metro and they were all drunk and acting a fool. We decided that if they happened to speak to us... We would pretend we had NO idea what they were saying!!! Anyways one of the guys drunkenly bumped into me and began saying he was sorry. Allie and I acted like we had no idea what he was saying.. So he proceeded to say "LOW SI-EN-TOE" (I'm sorry in Spanish) -- I spelled it this way because he said it broken just like this, very loud, very slow. I proceeded to say in my best Spanish accent. "No pasa nada". He tried to continue to speak English to us and we looked at him as if he were retarded (basically insinuating we had no idea what he was saying) ... Then the little girls sitting next to me.. Obviously at a more proficient level in her speaking and understanding started asking us questions about where we were from... How sorry she was about their behavior. Allie and I were both actually able to pull off that we were Spanish... How I have no idea... But I guess Americans will believe anything if you're good enough. Thought you all would like to know. Very funny experience.